By opening his heart, it was he who called the tragedy down upon em. For, for her it was plain obvious to see, these three words; I love you, would be a curse that brings nothing but sorrow and heartache for both. For in the depths of  the heart a storms lay hidden. But he, he was destined to ignore her warnings. 

And so, when with a single tear drop came the floods to drown em both, man stood prepared. For he had built a boat ready and she had her umbrella ...even if it was raining under it. 

And just as any storm would this one too eventually reach it´s end and during the calm it was the easiest thing to forget that the calm has claimed the lives of several sailors.

So secured by the calm and confident by himself, he never saw the sharks and she was gone. It must have been sheer faith in that old heart that still kept that boat floating any more.

For all hope seemed to be lost with her gone.

Eventually the faith was however lost also and then finally gave that little boat in under the weight of  the heart growing ever heavier day by day. For it was obvious for anyone to see that she was sleeping with the fishes now. 

And so slowly passed the days that felt like months and months that felt like years and years as long as decades in a starving solitude, when as if never gone she washed up on the shore of that little island he had called his home for all the time passed. Overwhelmed by joy he pulled her out of the waves.

 

To find out there was nothing but this desert island to keep these two strangers together anymore.

It was that extremely hot summer of 2007 when things started to fall apart. Or maybe things had been falling apart for a longer period of time and it had only gone unnoticed for me. It is hard to say what is the truth and I can´t remember so well anymore. Nevertheless it was that very very hot summer when you and me were too much apart already. Me occupied with my job out of town and you busy with your own stuff, I´m ashamed to admit now, I was never even too interested in knowing about. 

When we were together again you told me I looked good with the new muscles that I had got from working on a construction and I tell you, you look beautiful and thinner after that new diet of yours, not knowing that you have actually developed a eating disorder while I was gone over some shit I had said. And we would try to fix things with drunken sex with third parties during those sweaty nights together. 

And he roughs you up while I watch and I know that it get´s you off and you enjoy it. You tell me how good he is with his fingers and tongue and how good it feels to be taken like that. I love you and I don´t mind.

Only this one time something is wrong and you start crying.

and

I don´t know how to react.

Until my jealousy suddenly takes over.
 These feelings I didn´t know to exist they come pouring down like a violent rain. They rush through my heart, my arms and fists and everything I had kept suppressed  I now let flow out, through  my arms, my fists into this rope and  squeeze around his neck.
 I hope you feel better now my love, seeing the lengths I´m willing to go.   

Fine. Now that I´m caught anyways, I guess there is no harm in coming clean with what I did. I killed her. Yes it was me, I confess. I did it. After three fucking years don´t you think I deserved something better? Better than a fucking SMS; "I have met someone else and actually this has been going on for six... SIX FUCKING MONTHS!?! ...already." She writes me that she doesn´t want to see me in person, because she thinks I might be angry. I have never ever hurt her in anyway and THIS! This what I get. Fuck NO! You were supposed to be mine. You were supposed to love me. We were supposed to be together forever. NO! This is unacceptable. So I go over to her and I take back what is mine. I force that life of hers out and it will be mine forever now.

Taking your life didn´t help thou and I find myself even more saddened by the idea of being apart from you now that the anger is gone. I love you baby all I want is to keep you close to me, but in life you abandoned me and in death you are gone also... Unless!
 ...and so I take and I carve and harvest all eatable parts of you. This way we will be together till the end of time.

Your thighs make nice steaks. I even go through the trouble of making sausages from your flesh. I use your own guts for making those after I have washed all the shit out of em.

And with corn and spring potatoes with butter... Baby you taste SOOOOO GOOD! I keep eating you for two months.

But eventually you ran out as you always have and even this meaty diet of you has made me constipated eventually I just have to let go and I cry out of control over the thought of losing you again. 

When someone finally figured out you were missing (I bet it was that new boyfriend of yours) and the police came to question me, I had been locked inside my toilet for two weeks eating my excrement again and again. Certain that this was the only way not to lose you.

Then in the police car they had the radio open with some Eminem song playing in the air like a bad joke, going something like this; "My Darling, I don't ever want you to leave me
My Darling, you and me were meant to be together
My Darling, And if I cannot have you, no one can, you're myMy Darling, cause I possess your soul, your mind, your heart and your body" 

Doubtfully had anyone seen such a protest against human life before as was seen in regional hospital of Kuusankoski on 23rd of August in 1984 at 3:15 am, when our, only two days earlier born redeemer welcomed the mankind to the lowest depths of hell. Terribly scaring the night nurse, by speaking out those words, before crucifying himself into the cradle he had been lovingly swaddled.  

Asko had decided to disembowel the world. Even it would kill him.